Since I was 17, I was fascinated with the theories of Sigmund Freud. I got hands of my first book when my stepfather forgot to lock his room and I walked in, to discover naked images of a son sucking his mother’s tits and the mother deriving pleasure out of it. This book was kept on a pile of porn magazines showcasing images of men being trampled by women, women wearing only spandex boots and many such perverted images that would have destroyed the innocence of a 17year old. Instead of being disturbed, I was fascinated, and I wanted to do things that were showcased in those magazines to the men in my life.
So, when I reached 20 and I made my first boyfriend, we decided to kiss. I kissed him hard enough to make him bleed. The taste of his blood in my mouth, sent me in a state of sexual trance and made me wet. He on the other side, was disturbed, called me a freak and ran away. As I was growing, I often observed my father ill-treating my mother, sometimes in private by slapping her for pouring more gravy on his meat and sometimes in public, when he didn’t allow her to order a meal at the restaurant because she forgot to wear his favourite dress. These incidences use to boil my blood and I wanted to take the charge in my hands.
So, one day after a similar incidence at home, I walked into his room, picked his leather whip and smacked him right on his butt. He was shocked to see this side of my personality and stared at me with anger. Suddenly, his expressions turned mellow and he said, “You little cunt, you are enjoying this aren’t you? I knew it when I saw you for the first time, that you are a born dominatrix”. I was confused, so he explained the little role play he does with my mother wherein he is the dominatrix and she a submissive. Apparently, they both derive pleasure out of their actions, resulting in their happily married life.
With all the information he gave me, with his words, videos, books and even apparatus, I knew what I wanted to be when I grew up, an escort girls. Yes, I did. Some may find it weird or even creepy to some level, but I wanted to be the best fetish sex escort girl that ever lived. So, I honed my skills by experimenting on many submissive partners. I used to blind fold my favourite ladies and gag them with my foot. I punched the balls of my boyfriends with a boxing glove. And my favourite, I walked most of them around the house, naked with only a pet belt around their genitals. Exciting, isn’t it? But as normalcy permits, they all ran away. So, I travelled to Amsterdam to make my fetishes into a profession.
There are many female domination escorts in Amsterdam. Men and women from around the world travel here to try this unusual sexual experience of being a dominant or a submissive. We escort usually conduct a psychological session with the participant, to know their experience in this department and to set their limits right. We even dress up to play our part in their desires. My personal favourite are people who come with daddy issues. With a first-hand encounter in this area, I never shy away from dressing up like their daddy and whip their sorry asses away. My colleagues say I am twisted and have my own ways of dealing with childhood trauma, especially with a dad like that. But I feel grateful to him to help me open my mind towards my own sexuality and treat everyone with a twisted mind with respect.
As an expert in escort service and taboo sex, we have people who are willing to pay the price to go a mile further. They want to engage in sexual pleasure that gives them pain. Pain that is not just physical but also mental in nature. My customer from Los Angeles requests me to suffocate him till he passes it. This is scary but there is a thin line of identifying the limits of one’s suffering and letting it go. When you are handling an emotionally imbalanced client like this, you must keep your feelings at check because if you let go, they might lose their lives. At such times, as a policy, we allocate a ‘safe word’ for them. Every time they feel discomfort, or we do, we announce the safe word to pause the activity. I have another regular from Holland who wants me to wear his mother’s dress and suck my tits. As per his instructions, as soon as I notice his hard dick, I am asked to sit on his face and make him feel warm under his very own mother’s dress. He often cries after the session in the memory of his dead mother.
Being a dominatrix is not just about showcasing your power but to help people release their suppressed emotions just like your own. When I saw my father, all those years ago, beating up my mother, I wanted to stop her pain and hence I decided to wear the mask of a dominant woman in the family to represent my mom and get her out of her misery. Today, it has made me into a very strong woman who can take over the world. Yes, I have had my share of heart aches, especially when my mom passed away. I released her pain from my body by being a submissive myself that night and let someone help me bring back my emotions on track. Such extreme sexual encounters also bring you closer to the divine. As Osho rightly said, that the only moment in your life when you are away from all the earthly desires and closest to the divine is when you cum. And in my professions, I have had the opportunity of coming closer to the divine, many a times. So, I would strongly recommend getting out there and exploring your fetishes to make you in to a stronger and stable human being.